Friday, March 27, 2009
Overhead Assignment
The person who I admire the most is my uncle. He is the exact definition of what a man should be. He loves his family, is a protector and provider, and though he has made a lot of mistakes in his past, he chooses not to let them weigh him down. He is also constantly moving towards a brighter future. He inspires me because he has risen from the slums and gangs of the west-side of Chicago to be a pastor of his own church right in South Holland. He might not have his own church but he is still aspiring and doing what he can to make his dreams happen.
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Their Eyes Were Watching God
If this is confusing, I'm very sorry. It made sense to me at first, but now I can't tell what was going through my mind when I came up with this. Guess it's appropriate I named my blog "It seemed like a good idea @ the time."
“There are years that ask questions and years that answer. Janie had had a chance to know things, so she had to ask. Did marriage end the cosmic loneliness of the unmated? Did marriage compel love like the sun the day?”
Through out my life there have been many questions that have plagued my mind, but this particular question more than others. I too have wondered what the purpose of marriage was, why it was sacred, and why do most fail. If it’s supposed to be about companionship then why do people wind up leaving each other? Moreover I wonder why were there so many people that go on the dating scene, cruise the bar for a little action, only to be let down in some way. This Janie experiences with three failed marriages: one with a man she was never in love with, one with a man whom she fell out of love with, and one with a man she had to kill to keep from being killed. So what is the answer?
The answer to that question is simple; love. Though the answer is very simple to understand, it’s very complicated to attain. Since the beginning of man, from the bible’s point of view, man has always strived hard for love and tried to fulfill the need to have someone to be emotionally connected to. Even from birth, an infant strives for its parental figures attention and love. This child will go through extreme measures to fulfill that need and when it isn’t fulfilled properly it often leads to abandonment issues and scars the child for life. As portrayed through her dream about the pear tree Janie is striving and has a deep yearning for love. She never met her father. Her mother was never around long enough to fulfill that need and she lost the one person who did love. But it’s through Janie’s story that Hurston explores the concepts of love, what it has to do with marriage, finding love and loving you.
As displayed through Janie’s marriages, and looking at most people’s marriages today, marriage doesn’t end loneliness. She was married three times and in each marriage she felt a certain degree of loneliness. There are people today that are married but will feel lonely with their spouse sitting right beside them. I’ve known people to be alone that live in a house full of people. The reason for this is a lack of love and that is exactly Janie’s problem. Her situation is comparable to that of a child. All children have a need for love and when that need is fulfilled properly it often leads to abandonment issues and scars the child for life. This causes a child to begin to feel emotions of rejection and search for love in the wrong places. Janie experiences this when she won’t allow herself to feel Mr. Killick’s love for her and when she is eager to run off with Jody immediately after meeting him.
Also displayed through Janie’s marriages is that love might compel marriage but marriage doesn’t compel love. At the beginning of her relationship with Jody love was there but soon it was gone. Just as quick as love can enter a person’s heart even before the thought of marriage occurs, it can just as quickly be wiped from the person’s heart after marriage and the person can lose interest and, just like a child feeling rejection, reject love from those that do love them. This will also lead them reject sound advice from others, like when Janie was advised by her friend to be careful in dealing with Tea Cake.
In the end all the complications that involve love doesn’t really matter. As Janie learns loving yourself is the most important thing even if you can’t find the right one, or you aren’t able to fulfill that need for love through another person. That what a lot of people have to learn to do; be independent and love themselves instead of causing yourself pain by trying to find love through other’s.
“There are years that ask questions and years that answer. Janie had had a chance to know things, so she had to ask. Did marriage end the cosmic loneliness of the unmated? Did marriage compel love like the sun the day?”
Through out my life there have been many questions that have plagued my mind, but this particular question more than others. I too have wondered what the purpose of marriage was, why it was sacred, and why do most fail. If it’s supposed to be about companionship then why do people wind up leaving each other? Moreover I wonder why were there so many people that go on the dating scene, cruise the bar for a little action, only to be let down in some way. This Janie experiences with three failed marriages: one with a man she was never in love with, one with a man whom she fell out of love with, and one with a man she had to kill to keep from being killed. So what is the answer?
The answer to that question is simple; love. Though the answer is very simple to understand, it’s very complicated to attain. Since the beginning of man, from the bible’s point of view, man has always strived hard for love and tried to fulfill the need to have someone to be emotionally connected to. Even from birth, an infant strives for its parental figures attention and love. This child will go through extreme measures to fulfill that need and when it isn’t fulfilled properly it often leads to abandonment issues and scars the child for life. As portrayed through her dream about the pear tree Janie is striving and has a deep yearning for love. She never met her father. Her mother was never around long enough to fulfill that need and she lost the one person who did love. But it’s through Janie’s story that Hurston explores the concepts of love, what it has to do with marriage, finding love and loving you.
As displayed through Janie’s marriages, and looking at most people’s marriages today, marriage doesn’t end loneliness. She was married three times and in each marriage she felt a certain degree of loneliness. There are people today that are married but will feel lonely with their spouse sitting right beside them. I’ve known people to be alone that live in a house full of people. The reason for this is a lack of love and that is exactly Janie’s problem. Her situation is comparable to that of a child. All children have a need for love and when that need is fulfilled properly it often leads to abandonment issues and scars the child for life. This causes a child to begin to feel emotions of rejection and search for love in the wrong places. Janie experiences this when she won’t allow herself to feel Mr. Killick’s love for her and when she is eager to run off with Jody immediately after meeting him.
Also displayed through Janie’s marriages is that love might compel marriage but marriage doesn’t compel love. At the beginning of her relationship with Jody love was there but soon it was gone. Just as quick as love can enter a person’s heart even before the thought of marriage occurs, it can just as quickly be wiped from the person’s heart after marriage and the person can lose interest and, just like a child feeling rejection, reject love from those that do love them. This will also lead them reject sound advice from others, like when Janie was advised by her friend to be careful in dealing with Tea Cake.
In the end all the complications that involve love doesn’t really matter. As Janie learns loving yourself is the most important thing even if you can’t find the right one, or you aren’t able to fulfill that need for love through another person. That what a lot of people have to learn to do; be independent and love themselves instead of causing yourself pain by trying to find love through other’s.
Thursday, February 19, 2009
Argument and Persuasion
Meaning
Koch's thesis is that all life is precious and that the death penalty helps to support it and to keep those that would do it harm at bay and protect its preciousness. That if the death penalty had even been a consideration in the murderers mind before the crimes were committed, then the murderers might not have committed them at all.
For the issue about capital punishment as a deterrent to murder Koch used the case where a man named Richard Biegenwald was released from prison after 18 yrs. for murder and committed 4 more since his release. He also used the case of Lemuel Smith who, while serving 6 life sentences killed a corrections officer and that most convicts of murder have murdered before. For the issue about capital punishment as a form of justice Koch argues that the death penalty strengthens the value of human life and the lowering for the penalty of murder would signal a lesser regard for the value of the victims life and that philosophers, such as Kant, Locke, Hobbes, Rousseau, Montesquieu, and Mill, all agreed that natural law authorizes the sovereign to take life in order to vindicate justice. Each issue relates back to the thesis under the premise that all life is sacred and that the death penalty helps support that fact.
Purpose and Audience
1. From my perspective it does seem like his view is political. It does seem like he is trying to persuade the audience to agree with him, but at the same time it seems like he is answering a question that you might hear in a presidential debate, that its rehearsed and instead of just getting the audience to merely agree, that he wants us to hop on the band wagon and follow him.
2. I don't think that he expects the audience to agree with him so he deploys a tactic that doesn't try to gain sympathy but get us to hear what he has to say. That is why he starts off with evidence and the story of the murderer trying to preach ethics and morality to everyone, to make the murderer seem insane for telling the audience what to do and deceitful and probably better off dead.
3. To fight for justice, help those that are in need and not to ignore pleas for help and to look the other way. That is the same thing that help kill Kitty Genovese and why he explains people want rights but don't the responsibility that come with those rights.
Method and Structure
The appeals that I find are most effective are the examples he use to convey that if any of the murderers used in his argument were put to death, then that would have definitely prevented them from murdering again.
The syllogism is that if the courts found both Willie and Shaw worthy of the death penalty that the state, the courts and the people who ran them were no better than both Willie and Shaw, because the state would be committing "murder" to show that murder was wrong. Koch says that what individual gives up certain right for the state to govern properly, giving that if an individual does then it would be murder, but because the state is doing it, it is in the name of justice.
Yes because he is saying what is truly barbaric would be to let these heinous crimes go unpunished just because there hasn't been a solution found that everyone can agree with.
Each of his example let the audience know that the murderers didn't just kill once and moved on with their lives, but that each one at some point killed more and more people and that some of those that were released from prison after being convicted of murder did it again. Each example also shows the audience that these murderers are without conscience and morality and don't have regards for human life.
Language
A combative tone, almost like instead of a general audience that he is talking directly to those that oppose his views and is saying these are the facts, you're wrong, get some common sense. His language just adds on the feeling that those who oppose his view are being talked down to, sort of like they are uneducated. I don't really too much care for his tone, if it wasn't for the examples I probably wouldn't even agree with his view.
That his views about capital punishment are right and that those who oppose him are wrong.
Writing Topic
I don't have too much experience with death. In my entire life I have only went to one funeral and have lost one person in my family that I knew. So I can just imagine what it feels like for someone to lose a loved one, or to have a loved one taken away brutally. I, as a Christian, believe that murder is wrong without just cause, such as self-defense, but I do believe that capital punishment is the best way to deal with those who murder just for the sole reason of taking a life. The bible talks a lot about how you reap what you sow, in our terms that’s what goes around, comes around, or karma. It's really the perfect way of keeping everyone in the world in check, it makes him or her think about the consequences of their actions, and makes them feel the pain they have caused others. If I steal something from someone, something should be stolen from me, if I hit someone, I should get hit back, if I murder someone intentionally trying to do someone harm, I should suffer the same fate.
Koch's thesis is that all life is precious and that the death penalty helps to support it and to keep those that would do it harm at bay and protect its preciousness. That if the death penalty had even been a consideration in the murderers mind before the crimes were committed, then the murderers might not have committed them at all.
For the issue about capital punishment as a deterrent to murder Koch used the case where a man named Richard Biegenwald was released from prison after 18 yrs. for murder and committed 4 more since his release. He also used the case of Lemuel Smith who, while serving 6 life sentences killed a corrections officer and that most convicts of murder have murdered before. For the issue about capital punishment as a form of justice Koch argues that the death penalty strengthens the value of human life and the lowering for the penalty of murder would signal a lesser regard for the value of the victims life and that philosophers, such as Kant, Locke, Hobbes, Rousseau, Montesquieu, and Mill, all agreed that natural law authorizes the sovereign to take life in order to vindicate justice. Each issue relates back to the thesis under the premise that all life is sacred and that the death penalty helps support that fact.
Purpose and Audience
1. From my perspective it does seem like his view is political. It does seem like he is trying to persuade the audience to agree with him, but at the same time it seems like he is answering a question that you might hear in a presidential debate, that its rehearsed and instead of just getting the audience to merely agree, that he wants us to hop on the band wagon and follow him.
2. I don't think that he expects the audience to agree with him so he deploys a tactic that doesn't try to gain sympathy but get us to hear what he has to say. That is why he starts off with evidence and the story of the murderer trying to preach ethics and morality to everyone, to make the murderer seem insane for telling the audience what to do and deceitful and probably better off dead.
3. To fight for justice, help those that are in need and not to ignore pleas for help and to look the other way. That is the same thing that help kill Kitty Genovese and why he explains people want rights but don't the responsibility that come with those rights.
Method and Structure
The appeals that I find are most effective are the examples he use to convey that if any of the murderers used in his argument were put to death, then that would have definitely prevented them from murdering again.
The syllogism is that if the courts found both Willie and Shaw worthy of the death penalty that the state, the courts and the people who ran them were no better than both Willie and Shaw, because the state would be committing "murder" to show that murder was wrong. Koch says that what individual gives up certain right for the state to govern properly, giving that if an individual does then it would be murder, but because the state is doing it, it is in the name of justice.
Yes because he is saying what is truly barbaric would be to let these heinous crimes go unpunished just because there hasn't been a solution found that everyone can agree with.
Each of his example let the audience know that the murderers didn't just kill once and moved on with their lives, but that each one at some point killed more and more people and that some of those that were released from prison after being convicted of murder did it again. Each example also shows the audience that these murderers are without conscience and morality and don't have regards for human life.
Language
A combative tone, almost like instead of a general audience that he is talking directly to those that oppose his views and is saying these are the facts, you're wrong, get some common sense. His language just adds on the feeling that those who oppose his view are being talked down to, sort of like they are uneducated. I don't really too much care for his tone, if it wasn't for the examples I probably wouldn't even agree with his view.
That his views about capital punishment are right and that those who oppose him are wrong.
Writing Topic
I don't have too much experience with death. In my entire life I have only went to one funeral and have lost one person in my family that I knew. So I can just imagine what it feels like for someone to lose a loved one, or to have a loved one taken away brutally. I, as a Christian, believe that murder is wrong without just cause, such as self-defense, but I do believe that capital punishment is the best way to deal with those who murder just for the sole reason of taking a life. The bible talks a lot about how you reap what you sow, in our terms that’s what goes around, comes around, or karma. It's really the perfect way of keeping everyone in the world in check, it makes him or her think about the consequences of their actions, and makes them feel the pain they have caused others. If I steal something from someone, something should be stolen from me, if I hit someone, I should get hit back, if I murder someone intentionally trying to do someone harm, I should suffer the same fate.
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
"I Have A Dream"
Rhetorical Structure: Figures of Speech
King's opening phrase is an allusion to Abraham Lincoln. It was appropriate because the speech was given at the Lincoln memorial and Abraham Lincoln signed the Emancipation Proclamation, which freed millions of slaves and made it possible for King to even give his speech.
Declaration of Independence: I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal". Bible: I have a dream that one day every valley shall be exalted, and every hill and mountain shall be made low, the rough places will be made plain, and the crooked places will be made straight; "and the glory of the Lord shall be revealed and all flesh shall see it together."
Five score years ago, a great American, in whose symbolic shadow we stand today, signed the Emancipation Proclamation.
But we refuse to believe that the bank of justice is bankrupt.
"Justice rolls down like waters, and righteousness like a mighty stream."
The figure of speech displayed here is metaphoric. It's an effective method because it makes the listener to imagine someone being held back and weighted down with heavy chains. That though blacks were free they were still being held back because of discrimination and segregation.
The phrase ”Let freedom ring" and the phrase "One hundred years later".
These words can make the audience feel his passion and visualize his dream one day actually becoming a reality.
The second sentence in the second paragraph, which states "One hundred years later, the life of the Negro is still sadly crippled by the manacles of segregation and the chain of discrimination. It opened up my eyes to the fact that slavery ended only a little over one hundred years ago. It also opened my eyes up to the fact that it was not long ago that King was walking this earth and fighting for my civil rights and for me to enjoy the freedoms that I take for granted on a daily basis. Furthermore its opened my eyes to the fact that though this country have come a considerable distance over racial inequality that there is still much progress to be made.
Understanding the Dream
King's dream was that one day that not only black people but that everyone of every nationality, religion, class, gender, age, anything that makes us different from one another, can one day live in a land of diversity and tolerance.
Acts of discrimination and segregation, poverty, banning from public places, separate facilities "For White People Only" and "For Black People Only", police brutality, denial of right to vote, and unreasonable jailing.
That all men are guaranteed life, the right to live as one wants to live, liberty, the right to be free and citizenship, and the pursuit of happiness, all the rights and liberties of a free citizen.
I think he names them because those are the states in which racial prejudice has been heavily rooted and has been since the birth of the country as a free nation, and is still heavily rooted today.
I do think I would've been moved because I would have been one of the abundant masses that have experienced some racial discrimination and segregation during their lifetime.
Relating to the Dream
1. The looking down upon another race as inferior or unworthy based on the color of their skin.
2. I think they resorted to violence as a scare tactic and another way to oppress the black community, I also think that they knew that it wouldn't be long before blacks finally fought for and won their rights. I think they didn't take revenge because violence only brings on more violence and that responding with violence would've only made matters worse for the black community.
3. I think that those who aren’t racist are more dangerous. Living in our day and age there are more and more people that racially tolerant, sure there are those that are racist, but those who aren't will not stand by and watch the years of progress this country has made concerning that area go to waste, if they have to take it to the proper authorities or take matters into their own hands.
4. Most of Kings dream has come true. Blacks are able to vote, can't be banned from public places, all facilities must be united and equal, there is also no more segregation and discrimination. But there are still some instances of police brutality, not only against blacks, but everyone, just police officers abusing their power and there are many that live poverty stricken lives and live in the ghetto instead of suburban areas.
King's opening phrase is an allusion to Abraham Lincoln. It was appropriate because the speech was given at the Lincoln memorial and Abraham Lincoln signed the Emancipation Proclamation, which freed millions of slaves and made it possible for King to even give his speech.
Declaration of Independence: I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal". Bible: I have a dream that one day every valley shall be exalted, and every hill and mountain shall be made low, the rough places will be made plain, and the crooked places will be made straight; "and the glory of the Lord shall be revealed and all flesh shall see it together."
Five score years ago, a great American, in whose symbolic shadow we stand today, signed the Emancipation Proclamation.
But we refuse to believe that the bank of justice is bankrupt.
"Justice rolls down like waters, and righteousness like a mighty stream."
The figure of speech displayed here is metaphoric. It's an effective method because it makes the listener to imagine someone being held back and weighted down with heavy chains. That though blacks were free they were still being held back because of discrimination and segregation.
The phrase ”Let freedom ring" and the phrase "One hundred years later".
These words can make the audience feel his passion and visualize his dream one day actually becoming a reality.
The second sentence in the second paragraph, which states "One hundred years later, the life of the Negro is still sadly crippled by the manacles of segregation and the chain of discrimination. It opened up my eyes to the fact that slavery ended only a little over one hundred years ago. It also opened my eyes up to the fact that it was not long ago that King was walking this earth and fighting for my civil rights and for me to enjoy the freedoms that I take for granted on a daily basis. Furthermore its opened my eyes to the fact that though this country have come a considerable distance over racial inequality that there is still much progress to be made.
Understanding the Dream
King's dream was that one day that not only black people but that everyone of every nationality, religion, class, gender, age, anything that makes us different from one another, can one day live in a land of diversity and tolerance.
Acts of discrimination and segregation, poverty, banning from public places, separate facilities "For White People Only" and "For Black People Only", police brutality, denial of right to vote, and unreasonable jailing.
That all men are guaranteed life, the right to live as one wants to live, liberty, the right to be free and citizenship, and the pursuit of happiness, all the rights and liberties of a free citizen.
I think he names them because those are the states in which racial prejudice has been heavily rooted and has been since the birth of the country as a free nation, and is still heavily rooted today.
I do think I would've been moved because I would have been one of the abundant masses that have experienced some racial discrimination and segregation during their lifetime.
Relating to the Dream
1. The looking down upon another race as inferior or unworthy based on the color of their skin.
2. I think they resorted to violence as a scare tactic and another way to oppress the black community, I also think that they knew that it wouldn't be long before blacks finally fought for and won their rights. I think they didn't take revenge because violence only brings on more violence and that responding with violence would've only made matters worse for the black community.
3. I think that those who aren’t racist are more dangerous. Living in our day and age there are more and more people that racially tolerant, sure there are those that are racist, but those who aren't will not stand by and watch the years of progress this country has made concerning that area go to waste, if they have to take it to the proper authorities or take matters into their own hands.
4. Most of Kings dream has come true. Blacks are able to vote, can't be banned from public places, all facilities must be united and equal, there is also no more segregation and discrimination. But there are still some instances of police brutality, not only against blacks, but everyone, just police officers abusing their power and there are many that live poverty stricken lives and live in the ghetto instead of suburban areas.
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Salvation
Meaning
His main point in telling the narrative is to explain how based off of him telling one lie and deceiving many, his world was turned upside down he began to doubt the existence of Jesus.
A child named Westley, whom was sitting next to him during the service, decided to quit wasting and pretend that he had found God and pretended to be saved. After noticing he was the only one left and seeing how everyone reacted just to get him to get up and become saved, Hughes decided to also stop wasting time and deceive everyone, a choice that only causes him turmoil in the end.
I think that Hughes is saying that no one is truly saved from or that the only path to salvation, in his mind, is to confess one's faults, which is what he did.
Purpose and Audience
1. I think Hughes wrote "Salvation" as sort of confession, to get the actions he had partaken in off his chest, the way he felt about the existence of Jesus, which is sort of criticizing his aunt and the other adults for, in this case, "lying" to him. Sort of his journey to salvation.
2. He assumes his readers to be familiar with the setting of a southern, all-black church with the long hours of singing, praying, shouting (dancing or clapping to a set rhythm of drums, bass guitar, and organ), and capping it off with a pastor preaching with high emotion and ending the service with someone getting saved (most times services wouldn't end until at least one or two people did).
3. It makes the reader sit right where he was on the mourner's bench, feel the people around you and smother you with begs and pleas the go get saved, and the anxiety and pressure he is under as he remains in his seat, and his faith slipping as he doesn't "see" Jesus.
Method and Structure
I think he chose a narrative to show others through his story that no one is truly saved from sin, but if he chose to have done an argumentative essay it would not be impossible, but it would be a one-sided argument. It would be "Still bound by the chains of Sin".
He basically does it through out the entire narration. This makes the reader aware of how long he waited for Jesus to show and how when Jesus didn't it forced Hughes to lie about what happened.
Paragraphs 5-7 and 13-15.
It's essential because it explains all that what he went and how long he waited for Jesus to show up.
Language
He felt shame and doubt and that's because he had to lie to get the whole torturing ordeal over with and Jesus never showed up.
The effect I believe he is trying to achieve is the influence of the younger generation. In his adult life, as well in his child life, that night in the church was a waste of time to him and what he had to do to get out of the situation troubled him. I believe he is trying to keep someone else from making the same mistake.
Hughes meaning of "seeing" Jesus is Jesus actually appearing to him in the flesh, while his aunts meaning of "seeing" Jesus is having a visitation from Jesus in your soul, where you can't see him but feel him. The significance is that because he didn't physically see Jesus, it made him doubt that Jesus ever existed.
His main point in telling the narrative is to explain how based off of him telling one lie and deceiving many, his world was turned upside down he began to doubt the existence of Jesus.
A child named Westley, whom was sitting next to him during the service, decided to quit wasting and pretend that he had found God and pretended to be saved. After noticing he was the only one left and seeing how everyone reacted just to get him to get up and become saved, Hughes decided to also stop wasting time and deceive everyone, a choice that only causes him turmoil in the end.
I think that Hughes is saying that no one is truly saved from or that the only path to salvation, in his mind, is to confess one's faults, which is what he did.
Purpose and Audience
1. I think Hughes wrote "Salvation" as sort of confession, to get the actions he had partaken in off his chest, the way he felt about the existence of Jesus, which is sort of criticizing his aunt and the other adults for, in this case, "lying" to him. Sort of his journey to salvation.
2. He assumes his readers to be familiar with the setting of a southern, all-black church with the long hours of singing, praying, shouting (dancing or clapping to a set rhythm of drums, bass guitar, and organ), and capping it off with a pastor preaching with high emotion and ending the service with someone getting saved (most times services wouldn't end until at least one or two people did).
3. It makes the reader sit right where he was on the mourner's bench, feel the people around you and smother you with begs and pleas the go get saved, and the anxiety and pressure he is under as he remains in his seat, and his faith slipping as he doesn't "see" Jesus.
Method and Structure
I think he chose a narrative to show others through his story that no one is truly saved from sin, but if he chose to have done an argumentative essay it would not be impossible, but it would be a one-sided argument. It would be "Still bound by the chains of Sin".
He basically does it through out the entire narration. This makes the reader aware of how long he waited for Jesus to show and how when Jesus didn't it forced Hughes to lie about what happened.
Paragraphs 5-7 and 13-15.
It's essential because it explains all that what he went and how long he waited for Jesus to show up.
Language
He felt shame and doubt and that's because he had to lie to get the whole torturing ordeal over with and Jesus never showed up.
The effect I believe he is trying to achieve is the influence of the younger generation. In his adult life, as well in his child life, that night in the church was a waste of time to him and what he had to do to get out of the situation troubled him. I believe he is trying to keep someone else from making the same mistake.
Hughes meaning of "seeing" Jesus is Jesus actually appearing to him in the flesh, while his aunts meaning of "seeing" Jesus is having a visitation from Jesus in your soul, where you can't see him but feel him. The significance is that because he didn't physically see Jesus, it made him doubt that Jesus ever existed.
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